Comes in threes

13 Oct

It’s raining. There’s even thunder about. I’m gonna wait for the lightning and fireballs though before I sign off on the weather that best describes my mood today.

So. I’m 9 dpo (days past ovulation – yes, I count them) and I’m getting some pretty familiar feeling cramps. It’s hard not to cry, really, considering how much I got my hopes up this month it’s a surprise I haven’t flung myself out my office window. Luckily, windows in Western Sydney don’t open. We Westies prefer to use the transport system instead.

Anyway, while The Boy assures me the game isn’t over, I’m not inclined to agree. I know this feeling. Making matters worse is that my job is slowly starting to drive me into the wall (the only place I can go since the windows don’t open) and I can’t really afford to change jobs again – the three month switch is starting to look like a nasty habit. Plus, I haven’t exactly told The Boy that I’m stuck in yet another job I don’t really like. He doesn’t really get it and I feel like I have to stick something out or he’ll be all disappointed in me. Angry, I can handle. disappointed? Not so much.

It’s not as though there’s anything really wrong with my current job. It’s more the absence of excitement that’s pulling me down. I’ve got plenty to do, but it’s all so… old. The people. The designs. The organisational structure. They’ve gone and done what so many employers are want to do these days – hired a young’un – only to decide that they don’t really want any fresh ideas.

But to change jobs again… I don’t know. Part of me thinks I’m just living the typical Gen Y stereotype by switching employers whenever I don’t agree with something. Part of me just wants to do something I’m passionate about. OK, all of me wants that. But I’m finding that finding that something that I’m really passionate about – in a job that actually pays – is quite difficult.

So to recap – In the past hour I’ve realised that I’m stuck in a job I don’t love and I’m probably not pregnant. All I need now is a funeral – oh wait, that’s tomorrow – and we’ve got the trifecta.

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